Today, Amelia is one month old.
She’s fit seamlessly into our little(big) family as if fate always knew she was supposed to be here. There is no little girl more loved than our Amelia Rose. She has an army of arms ready to hold her any time of the day.
Every day, a little more of her personality emerges. She is constantly alert; hands and feet in constant motion, head bobbing and turning from side to side, eyes wide and watchful. She makes soft kitten noises and is quick to show off her dimple with lots of smiles. She takes Miles’ displays of affection in stride. She sleeps (beautifully) for hours on end and still has to be awakened to nurse most nights.
Kaleb is my fun. Miles is my joy. They are both loud, boisterous and constantly moving. They’ve pretty much always been that way.
I think Amelia is going to be my calm.
Maybe even quiet.
* * *
Initially when I thought about writing up Ame’s birth story I decided against it. I thought there wasn’t really much of anything to tell. I had a baby and women have babies all the time but my story about having my baby is important to me and for that reason, I’ve written some of it down.
We went to the hospital at 10:30pm on December 22nd. I’d thought at the time that my contractions were strong enough and I was close enough to the 511 rule to get admitted. It was all wishful thinking… I was discharged and sent home at 1:15am on December 23rd because I was only at 3.5cm and not in active labor.
I slept off and on when we got home and spent most of the day alternating from trying to relax in bed, to bouncing on an exercise ball, to stretching and doing yoga. By 2pm, my contractions were coming close enough that it was time to start timing them. Around 4pm, they were back to back and unbearable.
Thirty minutes later, we were in the car heading to the hospital. Let me just say that throughout the entire labor and delivery process, that freaking car ride was the most terrible. I was out of my mind and not even able to focus on anything anyone around me was saying or doing. I’m glad it only last 20 minutes because I don’t know that we would have all made it there safely if we lived further from the hospital. We got to triage, had to spend some time with the admin lady giving insurance info, while I died some more from what I now know was the start of transition, and then we were taken to our little curtained corner of triage.
The nurse examined me, informed us that I dilated to 8cm and then things started going fast. I was wheeled up to a room then then my bed was prepped. I can’t even begin to tell you about the crazy possessed noises I was making, but I having never been through natural childbirth, I kind of freaked myself out. I couldn’t stop apologizing to everyone. Even though I was the one in labor. Haha. Apparently the politeness that my mom instilled in me pretty much from the cradle is so ingrained that it cannot be turned off. Ever.
The nurses and Harry get me into my bed and my midwife said it was ok to start pushing.
An hour or so later, with Harry holding my hand, Amelia was born.
Harry took care of letting immediate family know that Amelia was here and that all was well. Then we had our hospital issued dinner and spent a lot of quiet time with just the three of us.
Mom K, Vicky and the boys came in to visit the following day (Christmas Eve). We were discharged later that evening and home just in time to watch the boys leave milk and cookies for Santa.
This was by far my most painful, scary birthing experience but it was beautiful. My arms were the first that held her and my face was the first that she saw. It was exactly what I hoped it would be. I had the natural childbirth that I’d been preparing, hoping and wishing for. I felt like I could rule the world. I wanted to get up and dance and sing and rejoice.